The Importance of Setting Boundaries in Addiction Recovery

Personal boundaries are an important aspect of the addiction recovery process. These boundaries are our “comfort zone”. These are limits we set for ourselves that define our self-worth, values and protect us emotionally and physically. 

Healthy boundaries help to establish healthy relationships. Relationships should be a source of fulfillment. If they drain you, then that means that something needs to be done.

Setting boundaries also plays a role in self-image. The way you feel about yourself is an important part of the addiction recovery process. Setting and keeping boundaries during addiction recovery is essential to creating a vital sense of self-worth. 

Respect is the foundation of healthy boundaries. Recovering individuals must learn to take accountability for their actions. When establishing boundaries with people, you’ll realize that it’s crucial to follow through on what you preach. Setting boundaries in addiction recovery means putting in the effort to maintain personal values. 

What are the Characteristics of Unhealthy Boundaries?

While the foundation of healthy boundaries is respect, for one’s self and others, the opposite holds of unhealthy boundaries. Unhealthy boundaries can come in the form of:

  • Belittling yourself.
  • Ignoring personal values to please others.
  • Degrading others for their beliefs or emotions.
  • Impulsive behavior, particularly in relationships.
  • Allowing others to tell you who and what you should be.

Who Should I Expect to Set Boundaries With?

There are many people in your life that you can expect to set boundaries with as you move along the addiction recovery process. Below are some examples of the various areas that a recovering individual will need to address:

1. Boundaries with family.

Family is usually a pretty big component in your life. Setting and maintaining boundaries with family members is a key component in addiction recovery. For example, you may have a loved one in your life that actively uses drugs. If that’s the case, then it’ll be important to discuss your addiction recovery with that person.

2. Boundaries with friends.

You can avoid potentially damaging situations by letting your friends know that they cannot be around you while they are drinking or using drugs. This is crucial to long-term sobriety. When those around you are on the same page, it’s easier to stay focused and motivated. 

3. Boundaries with your career.

While it is good to maintain productivity while in addiction recovery, it is also important to maintain a balance. High amounts of stress may lead to temptations regarding substance use. Taking the time to create a healthily balanced schedule will help keep you moving along in your addiction recovery journey. 

4. Boundaries with your significant other.

It’ll be important to discuss boundaries with your loved one. You will have to let them know that they shouldn’t drink or use any substance around you. Kindly let them know that their support and encouragement is a major component in your addiction recovery journey. Discussing what the expectations are of one another when it comes to shared responsibilities and lifestyle choices is key.

5. Boundaries with Yourself: The Most Important Person of All

Setting healthy boundaries with yourself is crucial to the addiction recovery process. Rebuilding self-confidence and practicing self-love is an ongoing process that takes time and effort.

Committing to stay sober one day at a time is a great first step. This could be the first internal boundary you set with yourself. As you keep this commitment each day, you’ll build confidence in yourself.

Doing this will also encourage you to continue setting healthy boundaries with yourself. This includes setting boundaries about what you eat, how often you exercise, how you spend your money, what time you go to bed every night, and what time you wake up every morning.

Setting Personal Boundaries in Addiction Recovery

We encourage you to keep in mind that setting boundaries is a learning process. Be compassionate with yourself as you move along the recovery process. A few helpful tips when it comes to setting boundaries in addiction recovery are:

Recognize harmful risk factors. Risk factors include places, people, possessions, behaviors, or thoughts. Once you’re aware of the risk factors, you can develop a plan to overcome them.

Create a plan to address harmful risk factors. After identifying the risk factors, the next step is to work with your addiction counselor to develop a plan to combat them. Your counselor will help provide a tool kit of clear actions that you can adopt into your everyday life. For instance, this may mean deleting phone numbers of old drug dealers from your phone. 

In other cases, changing your number is the best way to cut harmful relationships out of your life. Together, you’ll create a plan that focuses on setting healthy boundaries during the addiction recovery process.

Follow through. Staying true to your boundaries is just as important as setting them. Following through is key. Be honest with yourself and others who will hold you responsible for your promises and actions.

Seek out peer accountability. We encourage you to develop an accountability-system with those close to you. Being open about what boundaries you’re setting helps you stick to your word as you move along the addiction recovery process. For example, you can set weekly-check ins with your addiction counselor to ensure you’re sticking to the boundaries you set.

What are the Advantages of Setting Healthy Boundaries in Addiction Recovery?

There are many benefits top setting healthy boundaries in addiction recovery. These benefits will help you transform yourself, and your life. 

Some of the many benefits include:

  • Resisting temptation. Setting clear boundaries makes it easier to resist negative urges. Determining who you will and won’t spend time with, locations you will actively stay away from, and items you will not purchase, or handle are all effective ways to maintain sobriety.
  • Learning to say no. Learning how to say no is a skill you’ll learn to master. A major part of setting boundaries is getting aligned with your needs and priorities.
  • Gaining self-worth. Setting boundaries in addiction recovery will help you develop a sense of identity. As a result, your sense of self-worth will significantly improve. 
  • Improving communication. Setting boundaries also leads to learning better communication skills. With enhanced communication skills, comes enhanced relationships.

Additional Tips for Setting Boundaries in Addiction Recovery

To reiterate, setting boundaries is a learning process. As you continuously set these boundaries, you’ll get better at it. 

Below are a handful of tips to help you set effective boundaries in addiction recovery:

  • Identify your motives for setting boundaries.
  • Communicate your feelings and thoughts. 
  • Prepare for the conversation about boundaries with different people in your life ahead of time.
  • Learn to recognize when boundaries are being crossed.
  • Remove yourself from the situation or relationship if you feel that your boundaries aren’t being respected.
  • Try not to change or adjust your boundaries. Follow through on what you’ve set!

Focusing on taking the necessary actions to rebuild your life is a major component of the addiction recovery process. The purpose of setting boundaries is to help that process. 

Setting boundaries early on can make it easier to set yourself up for long-term success.

Ways to Say No to Drugs and Alcohol

Setting boundaries also means knowing when to say no. You may find yourself in future situations where you are being offered to use a particular substance. It’s best to prepare yourself for these situations ahead of time. Different ways to say include:

  • No Thank You: “No thank you” is a simple and straightforward way to decline an offer to use drugs or alcohol. You can leave after that or change the subject.
  • I’m Sober Now: Sometimes it’s best to be upfront. People can be persistent. You can let those people know right away that you’ve put a lot of effort into maintaining sobriety and don’t plan on stopping. 
  • I’m Driving: If you don’t want to give details, you can start by telling someone you’re the designated driver. This can save you a lot of explaining and back-and-forth. 
  • I’m In Recovery Now: If it comes down to it, you can tell the individual or individuals about your recovery. Recovery may have a deeper meaning than sobriety to certain people. It implies that you’re on a mission to better yourself. 
  • No: “No” is a two letter sentence that doesn’t need explaining. You don’t owe an explanation as to why you don’t feel comfortable.

Setting Boundaries in Addiction Recovery is Key: We Would Be Honored to Help You!

At Coastal Detox, our goal is to help you become the best version of yourself. We believe that every individual has massive potential. 

Long-term sobriety is the focus along with creating a plan to get the absolute most out of your life. With the right tools and support, you can transform yourself. If you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to give us a call. You can contact us here to begin your recovery journey today.

Real Client Testimonials

  • Before coming to coastal I was hopeless, helpless, and my family wanted nothing to do with me. It wasn’t the first detox I’d ever been to, but it was the only one who showed me so much love and compassion. They gave me hope. It’s hard to put into words the amount of gratitude I have for this facility. The employees were my family when I had none. The staff went out of their way to make sure not only were my physical needs taken care of, but my emotional needs as well. From the first phone call prior to admission, to helping me set up continuing care, they never missed a beat. Even going as far as to help me with my legal issues via Zoom court. This isn’t just a detox, they are the family I never had. All of the techs, especially Karen, are phenomenal. They will take the time to listen to you, laugh, and cry(if needed) with you. If you are reading this and you or your loved one is suffering like I was, go to Coastal Detox. The level of care is more than I could ever put into a review. It wasn’t the first detox I’d been to, but it has been my last; I owe them everything I have today, including my life.

    Travis B. Avatar
    Travis B.
    12/07/2020
  • Had a really good experience at Coastal. The staff really went above and beyond in helping me get in and gave me the respect l, space and care I needed after I first got there. As I started to fell better they encouraged me to take part in groups which helped get me out of my head and bring positivity and health to my thinking. They had a great massage therapist, who came daily and it was evident the nursing staff genuinely cared. Got to know some of the staff as well and I’m grateful for the cooks Joe and Chris. Those guys literally made us sirloins and pork chops for dinner. Also I gotta thank Chris and Chris for helping me get in and setting me up with a transition plan. Real grateful for that help, I’m not sure if it’s management intention to hire guys named Chris but they got a good thing going there. Overall, I’m clean and sober today and walking it out. Coastal gave me a base that set me up for the success that I’m walking in today

    Brandon B. Avatar
    Brandon B.
    1/16/2020
  • My family is very thankful for Coastal Detox. They have went above and beyond for my son a few times. Unfortunately he has needed their help more than once and they have ever turned their back on him, even when he was at his worst. Jeannie and Chris have been amazing and kept me informed through the entire process. They truly care about the addict and want to help them especially when it would be easy to give up on them. I had many detox facilities be rude and uncaring to me when I was searching for help for my son, but Coastal never did that to us. I don't know the names of all the team members that have helped my son but I know their are many and y'all are angels!! One day we will be able to pay it forward and help someone as you have helped us. Thank you for all you do!!

    Brenda A. Avatar
    Brenda A.
    1/01/2020
  • Can not say enough nice things about Coastal Detox & staff. Family member was there, told me five stars for the facility & all whom she interacted with. Said the facilities, ambience..., cleanliness, grounds, food, (think their chef is five stars), were all top shelf. All I interacted with personally & on the phone were patient, professional, responsive & caring. Kudos to so many: Jeannie Jones, Clinical Director whom I spent the most face to face time with: great oversight, patience & follow thru. Raquel Barker, Therapist was so understanding & on spot with her assessments/care. Kris Garrigus Admissions Director, another Coastal professional whom I cannot say enough nice things about, always so patient & responsive to my probably too frequent inquires. Not to be forgotten is Judy Tucker, Director of Operations she too so patiently "put up with me"
    I highly recommend Coastal Detox

    Susan C. Avatar
    Susan C.
    11/13/2019
  • Can not say enough nice things about Coastal Detox & staff. Family member was there, told me five stars for the facility & all whom she interacted with. Said the facilities, ambience..., cleanliness, grounds, food, (think their chef is five stars), were all top shelf. All I interacted with personally & on the phone were patient, professional, responsive & caring. Kudos to so many: Jeannie Jones, Clinical Director whom I spent the most face to face time with: great oversight, patience & follow thru. Raquel Barker, Therapist was so understanding & on spot with her assessments/care. Kris Garrigus Admissions Director, another Coastal professional whom I cannot say enough nice things about, always so patient & responsive to my probably too frequent inquires. Not to be forgotten is Judy Tucker, Director of Operations she too so patiently "put up with me"
    I highly recommend Coastal Detox

    Susan C. Avatar
    Susan C.
    11/06/2019

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