Ah the family dynamic, a forced relationship that has been challenged and changed for thousands of years through different ethnicities, trials, and tribulations. This is a type of relationship that stands as a priority above all. Blood is thicker than water- isn’t that how the saying goes? Everybody and their family has a specific dynamic that makes the relationship “special”, and there’s no denying that. Love is what generally encompasses any family relationship whether it is extended or immediate.
However, attached to any batch of love usually are worry, doubt, and/or existential fear. When any family member of any sort watches their loved ones begin to struggle with substance abuse- it knocks the breath out of them. The thought of somebody you care about immensely throwing their lives away hurts to watch. How are we supposed to just sit by while irrational thoughts take over?
Addiction is a sinister bully that will take more than your lunch money and leave you broken. When it comes to helping loved ones- especially that of family, there must be a cautious way to go about it so as to not allow ourselves to get sucked into the gravitational pull of the disease. When it comes to family support, there is a fine line between giving the help needed and enabling for the help wanted.
On the Horizon
One thing to keep in mind as we look into family support with chemical dependency is that this mental disease is a family disease. It is not something that can just be forgotten about or just said no to. This is a mental blockage that must be dealt with for a lifetime once activated. There is a light at the end of the chemical tunnel where addiction doesn’t reign like the evil tyrant it is. To find this light takes time. This means putting in a lot of work on ourselves. Most of us are dealing with other psychological concerns on top of our abuse, so with multiple issues coupled together, they’re not going to disappear overnight. Some of these issues that go hand in hand with alcoholic thinking so well are:
- Body Dismorphic Issues
- Cross Addiction
These are just a few to get the ball rolling. It’s safe to say that family support usually has a lot of obstacles to overcome without enabling the situation.
Yes, addiction usually bares some discomforting problems with it, but these are never a death sentence for the person willing to change. Doing introspective work on ourselves and discovering how our gears turn is the basis to it all. It takes years and years to do that kind of work on an individual, and so to have expectations that it’s just smooth sailing if the drugs and alcohol are dropped is asking for a lot. Family support for an addict who’s actively using and family support for an addict family member in recovery are two entirely different things. On one hand, you’ll have a loved one that is like a hurricane of problematic events or the other hand where your loved one is themselves and can be loving and supportive right back. The choice lies within them though.
Being tolerant and providing family support is a big deal and takes a lot of time and patience. As just previously mentioned, your loved one is the product of their own decisions, but having that aid and moral support along the way can make a gigantic difference in how they perceive themselves thru the substance abuse. It’s safe to say that most all addicts and alcoholics didn’t wish to become one and end up being confused how they got to that point.
Family is Foundation
Addiction causes nothing but turmoil in most family dynamics. It’s hard to provide family support to somebody who provides no rational resolution. Addiction is one of the only diseases in existence that will try to convince the person it consumes that it doesn’t exist. Talk about a total brain teaser as your mind plays tricks on you! However, this does not justify the actions of an addict or alcoholic and the where-with-all they have while you try to give them family support.
Deep down inside, most persons dealing with substance abuse are aware of all the negativity in their lives- they’re just in denial about it. Usually, they just do not want to deal with their chemical dependency or they are not sure how to. This is where having family support to intervene or even just point out the truth can be the difference between life and death for some.
At the end of the day, showing family support to a loved one locked in addiction involves all the trials and tribulations that regular love for your family can carry. Communication is the key to making a difference in any relationship, especially one that involves alcoholic thinking. Alcoholic thinking kind of requires a special type of communication that builds on trust. Sometimes it may be best to remove ourselves from a toxic situation if there is no reasoning with your loved one. It may be difficult, but when showing family support, we cannot allow the selfish deeds of our loved ones take us down as well. There’s a time to abandon the ship, and a time to figuratively walk the plank because of adoration. Family support is finding that middle ground that can hopefully allow everyone to be happy.
Support is Support- Everyone Needs It
Everybody needs support at some point in time or another. Lifelike to toss barrel after barrel of obstacles in our direction and it’s up for us to dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge all the hurdles as they come unexpectedly. If you or a loved one has been struggling with getting a firm grasp on sobriety and need detoxification, please call 888-481-1993 or visit www.coastaldetox.com. Our team of specialists are waiting by to help figure out what options are best for sending your life is a supportive direction that you can proudly stand behind.